TOP 10 MEDIA MYTHS:

 10. The whole world is watching — not really. That’s soccer, sadly. Most of the world has seen American football, and having not grown up with it, think it’s quaint and/or pointless (i.e., the same way we think about soccer)

9. The ads are special and interesting and you have to watch them… unless you go online, or watch sports for the rest of the year

8. Teams win or lose the game depending on how they handle the hype… because hype causes turnovers

7. Wacky Questions on Media Day are sure entertaining… if you’re 12, and/or don’t remember the previous decade’s worth of Wacky Questions

6. Real fans go to this game and spend thousands of dollars… assuming your definition of a real fan is a c-level executive with an expense budget. (Your average Real Fan, when confronted with this decision, would rather spring for a big-screen TV.)

5. Greatness is measured and eternally conferred on a coach and quarterback that win one… and in other news, Trent Dilfer and Brian Billick are available to show you their rings at your wedding, corporate event, bar mitzvah or birthday party

4. The game is in a warm-weather or indoor site so that the outcome won’t be affected by the weather… and not, of course, for the benefit of the c-level execs who would not put up with chill factors or cold-weather prostitutes

3. Simultaneous toilet flushing causes massive sewer problems all over the world… and yet, that story is never reported on the next day

2. Many people bet those freaky prop bets, because no sane person can possibly withstand the temptation to go huge on the coin flip, or which WR Tom Brady will go to first

1. Every viewer will, by kickoff, have a clear choice of who to root for (Jets Fan and Eagles Fan are both rooting for Bruce Dern to show up in a blimp)

Courtesy of DMtShooter, Five Tool Tool.  More detail and other solid stories at www.epiccarinval.com

written by Roc